Taking care of myself as a mom
Some changes I've made over the years.
If you’ve followed me for awhile, you know some of my story of how I started meal prepping and planning. My husband and I were tired, didn’t feel well, and I had an 8 month old baby. We felt like we needed a change to feel our best selves. What started with a 30 day elimination diet, turned into a process, a lifestyle and Efficient Kitchen. We are coming up on four years of consistently following the same weekly process that has fueled our family better, saved money, and ultimately brought us closer as a family.
I think in motherhood, we can put ourselves on the back burner. I’ve had a few years now of learning to take care of myself in ways where I can show up for my family better. I have had to learn that I am not limitless like God. I have boundaries and limits and can only do so much. I thought I would share some of the ways I’ve started caring for myself better to be a better wife and mother.
Joining a book club.
I think it’s important for our kids to see that we have interests outside of “just being a mom.” They also need to know that the world doesn’t *completely* revolve around them and that good friendships are important.
I found this book club through our church but it’s such an easy laid back concept. Read whatever book you want and come and talk about it what you liked and didn’t over some brunch that everyone brings. Simple as that. No pressure.
What I’ve enjoyed the most about this group is getting to know women that I wouldn’t ordinarily know across different generations. I’ve learned from women in their 20’s and women a *tad* older than me. I have been challenged by some of the younger women to tackle bigger books than I would normally read and brush off as “I don’t have time to do that.” Turns out I do. Most of the books that I read were 30+ hours or 800 pages or more. The challenge helped grow my mind, slow down and savor a really well written book in our very fast paced world.
Weight Lifting.
I’m so grateful to my college roommate who introduced me to the Ladder app. I had joined a gym again because I was struggling to pick up my 90th percentile 3 year old at the time and knew I needed to be stronger. After trying to do it on my own, I realized I needed some structure. I started training in a progressive overload style and fell in love. I’ve never been so strong in my life. Between switching to barefoot style shoes and weight lifting, I no longer have any back pain. I used to go the chiropractor weekly for adjustments with no permanent relief. Weight lifting gave me structure and confidence that I didn’t know I needed. (They have a great black Friday deal with BOGO on yearly memberships, so both my husband and I do this together but on different teams.)
I will also note that joining a gym with childcare is extremely life giving. It’s a win win for everyone and I’ve made a lot of friends and so have my children. We genuinely enjoy going and it’s nice for all of us to interact with friends!
Simplifying my closet.
At the beginning of the year, I was really honest with myself about my clothes. I had been working through a Pinterest board about what I liked and what fit my current lifestyle. I consigned or donated a large portion of my closet and it really lifted a weight off my shoulders. If it doesn’t fit, I got rid of it or put it in a special bin (if it was close to fitting). If I haven’t worn it in years, it doesn’t fit my lifestyle, not my color, etc etc, it was gone.
I took the money I made from consigning clothes and invested in pieces that I knew I would wear and love until they fell apart. For me that looked like some high quality barefoot style shoes (I could write a whole substack on this!), versatile items, and natural fiber clothing. I stopped any fast fashion. Other than workout clothes, no synthetic fibers. (I also could write an entire substack on this) I keep a list in my phone of items that I would like to purchase so I can wait for them to be on sale BUT they have to fit all my criteria.
Now when I look in my closet, I know everything fit and its something that I love.
Simplifying my toiletries.
I will SHOUT it from the rooftops about RMS Beauty’s free makeup consults. I did one last year with Lisa and it has taken all the guess work out of makeup. I get compliments on my makeup now at almost 40. I’ve never been super great at figuring out what to use but Lisa walked me through step by step what to use and how to apply it. Essentially, she turned makeup into a paint by numbers situation. I have “fall colors” and “spring colors” and it’s so easy to use. It takes me 5 minutes to apply, and I really don’t own a ton of products. If you’re not feeling yourself, please get a free consult on their website. Their makeup is non toxic and high performing. It’s very lightweight and has really been a part of helping my skin.
I also want to give a shout out to Wild Ice Skincare. I met Mila at the farmers market in Rosemary Beach several years ago and grilled her on her products. I have been blown away by how much better my skin is from using her products. I have had four simple products on autoship for almost 3 years now. They perfectly last 90 days, are non toxic and preservative free. She’s a chemist and really knows her stuff, plus she has so many tutorials on her website for face taping and face massage that have helped me get rid of some deep 11 lines.
Get $30 off your first order with Wild Ice Botanicals here.
An honorable mention is I stopped bleaching my hair. Mostly my natural color plus some color, not bleach highlights in the front to blend the greys. Cheaper, looks better and my hair is finally growing and healthy again.
Organizing and decluttering my house.
I’ve joked for a long time that I would love to work for the home edit. However, this did not come naturally to me at first. If you saw my childhood packrat bedroom, you would understand. I started taking space by space, room by room, drawer by drawer and decluttering.
The great part about this is you can sell a lot of items to fund getting containers. Another great tip is to use the ThredUp bags from the Container Store. They will sell your old clothes and give you Container Store credit. Do NOT do it directly because they will give you a FRACTION of what you get in Container store gift cards. (Make it make sense.)
We still have some areas that always need touch up since our home doesn’t have a huge amount of storage space and we have small children with constantly changing needs. I have learned to let go of items and that has really given me a lot of peace with less items in our home. I have also realized that we don’t need as many things as we think we do. Simplifying how many products we use in our bathrooms, cleaning supplies, and kitchen have made a huge difference too.
Find my favorite laundry products here.*
Last one… an easy hobby that I can take with me.
I should probably pair this with my book club because often my audio books and needlepointing go hand in hand. I have found it gives my brain a much needed analog break. Needlepoint is NOT cheap but I’ve found making some of my own canvases is a nice way to save money on it.
I have found that having a creative outlet is kind of a must have for me but most of my hobbies are not conducive to small children being around and need larger chunks of time.
With needlepointing, I’ve found I can do 10-15 minutes in carline, while I’m waiting at appointments, or small pockets of time that I find here or there. No big production to set up and I can keep the zippered bag in my purse.
Circadian Rhythm.
Not to sound woo woo, but some small changes in taking care of my circadian rhythm greatly improved my sleep. I try to see the sunrise first thing in the morning and if it’s still dark, I’ll do a couple of minutes of red light therapy on my face while I’m getting ready. I try to eat dinner before it’s dark and wear blue blockers* once it’s dark too. Not a ton to it but even just a few light breaks make a big difference. I also switched out our lightbulbs for more amber* or red* bulbs. I do amber in lamps around the house and red light bulbs in bedrooms.
You can read up on the science with queen of circadian rhythm- Sarah Kleiner. She has tons of free resources.
What are some ways you’ve helped taking care of yourself? Comment below.